Do you ever struggle with feeling simply not enough?
I’m in a season of living outside of my wheelhouse. Few things feel comfortable and ordinary at the moment, even the supposedly ordinary things. Much waiting is taking place. I await phone calls and emails that have life-changing potential. Online connections are much more than news-sharing – they are windows for growth in business, continuation of relationship, and sharing outwardly what feels very private, our adoption journey. How can I meet these head-on with excellence and intentionality?
Many days I awake and feel like I’m already behind. A kink in the schedule throws off my equilibrium. Full disclosure: I’ve been a grouch the past few days. Can anyone relate?
Decisions to make. Tasks to accomplish. People interrupting thought trains. Schedules shifting. Where will I find an enough-ness that is enough to meet today’s demands?
“He said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.’ Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me.” 2 Corinthians 12:9
The enemy nags in my ear, “Fraud!” Will the nagging continue to distract attentions and detract worth? Or will I lean on a redirect? God, what do You have to say about this?
About not feeling like I’m enough? God is enough. His grace is sufficient. (2 Corinthians 12:9)
About the fear that if I mess up everything will collapse? God “upholds the universe by the word of His power.” (Hebrews. 1:3)
About the apprehension on how everything will turn out? He declares the end from the beginning. Nothing surprises Him. (Isaiah 46:10)
About feeling like I’m out of my element? He is with me and I have no need to fear. (Joshua 1:9)
When there seems to be too much – too many options, too many tasks, too many demands, too many unknown factors – we can return to the simplicity of knowing He is enough. He is enough. I don’t have to be, because He is. And knowing that, I can begin with simply the next thing. Not all the things. Just the next one.
There is a cup called “Enough”
And I pour myself all in…
All my abilities and dreams
All that I am and all that I have
But it’s sorely short of filling this cup
It’s just. not. enough.
Until He pours His plenty into my not enough
And suddenly my sorely lacking
Is overflowing abundance
What once was short of able
Is now fully capable
My lack plus His plenty
Is now…more than enough.
I no longer have to feign independence
But can boldly proclaim…He is sufficient.
Yesterday was one of those days in my land of mommy-hood…struggling to make it through the day…frustrated at the seemingly constant need for redirection, melt-down diffusion, and overall discipline. After these many moments with my son, when bedtime came for the kids, I was amazed when he skipped over to me with a smile and asked me to tuck him in. I figured after the day we’d had that he would much prefer Daddy to do the honors tonight. But, no. He wanted me! He held my hand all the way to his room…cuddled under the covers…turned over to give me a huge, squeezy hug and a sweet little-boy kiss. Before I closed his door, he said, “I love you, Mommy!”
So many things in life right now are great…exciting…fresh…wonderful. But then there’s that one glaring area of parenting where I find myself of late feeling like I’m failing, just trying to make it through the day. And it stings especially because tomorrow celebrates all of us “moms”!
A little while after getting him to bed, I was getting myself ready to sleep too and this realization came to me: “I am not enough!” But this time, it wasn’t the condemning voice of the enemy that I heard. It was me…realizing that my “not enough” added to God’s “more than enough” is plenty! And instead of feeling the brooding sense of failure, I felt a spark of hope. I don’t HAVE to be enough, because He is!
I don’t have to be super-mom. I don’t have to have all the answers. I don’t have to conjure up the strength to do this thing called motherhood. I am not enough so that I can lean on the One Who is!
I also don’t have to believe the lies that tell me I’m failing when my kids disobey or that my voice doesn’t matter when they don’t listen. Because reality is that I am succeeding and my voice makes a HUGE impact in my kids’ lives! When I tell my son how proud I am of him, he beams! When I tell my daughter how beautiful she is, inside and out, she smothers me with hugs! To them, I’m the best mom in the world! (Taking a humble moment to really believe that myself!)
I can trust in my kids who actually want me around, even after having been with me all day, every day. And tomorrow, when the “Happy Mother’s Day” sayings abound, I don’t have to feel condemnation in my “not enough”. I can remember my God Who is.
Are you a mom struggling to see the fruit of your labors? Don’t believe the lies that you’re a failure. You’re not! You are the best mom in the world to those kiddos you love and give yourself to every day! And God will make up every area of “not enough” you have with His “more than enough”.
Are you inTENtional in your relationships with your children? Beneath the weight of living and day-to-day responsibilities, it’s so easy to stay in survival mode. We think it’s too hard…we aren’t doing enough…WE aren’t enough. But God always is. When we partner with Him in raising these kiddos He’s entrusted to us, when we put aside time on purpose, we can live inTENtionally. Check out my latest ebook, The inTENtional Mama, a quick-read where the inspirational meets the practical day-to-day. You’ll be blessed, uplifted, inspired, and equipped to become an inTENtional Mama! [Available where ebooks are sold!]